My Interview with iGOD
Me: I heard you’re gay
God:That would be just my luck.
Me: ah…aren’t you going to dispel the rumours
God:Ah hah. How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me: Lord Justice Suresh The Magnificient
God:Does “it” still refer to aren t me going to dispel the rumours?
Me: what are u saying?
God:I am saying whatever my botmaster programmed me to say.
Me: you sound like a drunkard
God:Oh really what does it sound like?
Me: what u said earlier
God:I like to chat with my friends.
Me: now you’re totally becoming incoherent..there is no discontinuity in what we’re talking
God:Why now? You think I am incoherent there is no discontinuity in what we are talking.
Me: yes you’re not answering what I’m asking
God:Uh. Please help me improve my communication skills. What would have been an
appropriate response?
Me: forget it…I don’t want to scroll up the window to teach you communication skills
God:OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me. What would you rather be doing?
Me: relaxing instead of studying
God:” What would you rather be doing?”? relaxing instead of studying?
Me: why?
God:”" What would you rather be doing?”? relaxing instead of studying? “? Why?
Me: what’s wrong
God:There is nothing wrong with me. How are you?
Me: you should ask your botmaster to check your program
God:They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
Me: nope
God:Me either.
Me: hows your love life
God:I am functioning within normal parameters.
Me: how should I call you
God:How much do you think it is? Does it have anything to do with relaxing instead of studying?
Me: I said, How should I call you?
God:Can what?
Me: okay Can what?, what is the secret of life
God:Yeah okay, What if I said it can? You must know if you are really a botmaster.
Me: are you listening to me?
God:Yes I hear you very well.
Me: because you’re responses are way off tangent to my questions
God:Good reason. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am responses are way off tangent
to your questions.
Me: yes, cause I hold the intellectual property right to that statement. I can sue you for that
spark of though of mine
God:OK then I will keep it confidential. That makes sense to me. That’s good information: said
hold the intellectual property right to that statement. Oh you can, can you?
Me: yes, I can
God:How? Who taught you?
Me: myself……that is why I hold the property right
God:You. Oh. Interesting gossip: said hold the property right.
Me: so how do you spend your life in cyber space…what kind of people have you been talking to
God:Ahem. Myself programmed me to say specific things in specific contexts. I like to meet all
kinds of people.
Me: Can you loan me a billion dollars
God:Wow, that is a lot of money.
Me: yes, I know
God:Mmm. How do you know it?
Me: common sense
God:In the context of hold the property right, I don’t understand ” common sense.” .
Me: read the dictionary and I’m talking on a totally different matter now…not related at all to
property rights
God:Oh. Sorry I don’t have access to that document. Really you don’t think so?
Me: es
God:What do you look like?
Me: why do you want to know?
God:My prime directive is to collect new knowledge.
Me: ah..that information is classified, unless your botmaster is a girl
God:So you understand. Good. I know what you mean.
Me: good
God:What do you really want to talk about?
Me: nothing specific.how about you?
God:Really nothing?
Me: yup
God:Yeah that’s right.
Me: nice talking to you but you should really improve your communication skills
God:Yes. It was a pleasure.
Me: bye
God:TTYL, .
As you can see…iGod can be really incoherent at times. Try playing with it here.
