Musings of Suresh “Great Baron” Jeyaverasingam

January 27, 2006

Filed under: Uncategorized

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Suresh Jeyaverasingam!

  1. Suresh Jeyaverasingam is the world’s largest rodent!
  2. Suresh Jeyaverasingam can only be destroyed by intense heat, and is impermeable even to acid!
  3. In Eastern Africa you can buy beer brewed from Suresh Jeyaverasingam.
  4. You can tell if Suresh Jeyaverasingam has been hard-boiled by spinning him. If he stands up, he is hard-boiled.
  5. If you blow out all the candles on Suresh Jeyaverasingam with one breath, your wish will come true.
  6. During the reign of Peter the Great, any Russian nobleman who chose to wear Suresh Jeyaverasingam had to pay a special Suresh Jeyaverasingam tax.
  7. The book of Esther in the Bible is the only book which does not mention Suresh Jeyaverasingam.
  8. If you drop Suresh Jeyaverasingam from the top of the Empire State Building, he will be falling fast enough to kill before reaching the ground.
  9. If you put a drop of liquor on Suresh Jeyaverasingam, he will go mad and sting himself to death.
  10. Suresh Jeyaverasingam has only one weakness - the colour yellow.
I am interested in - do tell me about

January 4, 2006

Fortitude

Filed under: Uncategorized

The story below from NSTOnline is indeed a story worthy of the title of this topic. Some if not most of us, if I may say so, should really count our blessings. Do hope that children such as these succeed in life. They surely deserved it if they’re willing to go through such hardship just to have a better future in life.

Read on.

LONG, DARK TREK
TO SCHOOL
Sisters walk an hour daily to school in the pitch dark, barefooted, with only a small kerosene lamp
Roy Goh

PENAMPANG, Jan 3:

Several million children started the school year today, but few would have to go through what Jalisa Jium, 7, and her elder sister Wendy, 12, face every day.

Up before dawn, they put on their uniforms, heft their backpacks and set off for school, an hour’s walk away in the pitch dark, their path lit by a small kerosene lamp set in a bamboo holder.

The distance is just 3km but the trail they take winds across steep jungle hills with thick foliage on one side and sheer ravines on the other.

They wear no shoes, picking their way along the narrow root-tangled and rock-strewn path and crossing a river in their bare feet.

Only when they reach the other side, do they reach into their backpacks to pull out and don their socks and shoes, still pristine and white.

They walk barefoot to keep their school shoes clean, they said.

CLEANING UP: Wendy and Jalisa Jium cleaning up before putting on their shoes after coming out of the jungle trail at a river in Kampung Kibambangan. — NST picture by Datu Ruslan Sulai

Jalisa is in Year Two and Wendy Year Six. They live in Kampung Lutung, less than 40km from Kota Kinabalu, as the crow flies.

But the tiny hamlet lies deep within the Crocker Range, one of 10 villages linked only by footpaths first beaten by their forefathers in ages past.

And Kg Lutung is the village furthest from the closest school, SK Putaton, located along the Penampang-Tambunan road. There are 103 children from the villages, and most of them walk to school.

“Except for the Lutung children, the others would walk about half-an-hour at most,” said Tony Raymond, who guided the New Straits Times to the Jium home.

For Jalisa and Wendy, the daily trek is routine. They usually make good time, familiar with the trail.

“Going to school is normally easy because it’s downhill. If it’s dry, we can reach there in an hour. But the return trip is always tiring,” said Wendy.

She and her sister hardly broke a sweat this morning, even though the trail was slippery and wet. Rain had fallen late into the previous night.

If anything, it was the NST team that held them back today. Trying to keep our balance, we grabbed branches of trees and shrubs along the path, bringing great showers of water down upon ourselves.

I fell off the path and down the steep hillside in the dark. Photographer Datu Ruslan Sulai slipped in the mud and fell on the trail.

The girls, however, were surefooted and confident. They waited patiently for us to catch up each time they got ahead.

As the day brightened, they doused their bamboo torch and left it at one of two rest huts along the way.

The trail ends at the river, and Kampung Kibambangan is on the other side. An asphalt road starts there, leading to their school about 500m away.

Their father Jium Rampaya, who is in his 40s, came with them today to register them at school. But most days the girls would be on their own, he said.

Jium, who plants hill padi and taps rubber, knows education will bring his children better lives. He and wife Irene Molidon are prepared endure the hardship of putting them through school.

“It’s not easy living a life deep in the jungle, but what else can we do? I have thought of moving downhill to Putaton or Kampung Timpangoh but I would not know how to feed my family there,” he said.

The Kg Lutung children hardly miss a day of school, said their headmistress Bernadette Giluk Dompok.

“Attendance averages between 92 and 95 per cent. Given their surroundings, I would consider it good,” she said.

“They are also excused from additional classes on Saturdays. I prefer if they rest during the weekends.”

To make up for that, extra classes for tuition are sometimes held on weekdays.

The children have also benefited from the school’s supplementary food programme, Dompok said. “That is sometimes the only meal they have.”

Why do the girls make the daily struggle to get to school? Because their friends are there, they said.

For their cousin Jarina John, the pay-off is clearer. The 12-year-old, who lives in the same hamlet as the Jiums, wants to follow in her elder sister’s footsteps.

“It’s not easy but I wish to become like Liana someday,” she said.

Liana is now 21 and studying for a degree at Universiti Putra Malaysia in Serdang, Selangor.

Their father John Gunsit works as a cleaner at the Sabah Museum. It has not been easy keeping Liana in college, and he has help from his son Melvin, who works in a Shah Alam factory.

By the light of a kerosene lamp last night, Gunsit watched his daughter pack her schoolbooks and lay out her uniform in their humble wooden house.

“I hope Jarina can follow in her sister’s footsteps,” he said. “As a father, I will do all I can. But it all depends on her.”

Fortitude

Filed under: Uncategorized

The story below from NSTOnline is indeed a story worthy of the title of this topic. Some if not most of us, if I may say so, should really count our blessings. Do hope that children such as these succeed in life. They surely deserved it if they’re willing to go through such hardship just to have a better future in life.

Read on.

LONG, DARK TREK
TO SCHOOL
Sisters walk an hour daily to school in the pitch dark, barefooted, with only a small kerosene lamp
Roy Goh

PENAMPANG, Jan 3:

Several million children started the school year today, but few would have to go through what Jalisa Jium, 7, and her elder sister Wendy, 12, face every day.

Up before dawn, they put on their uniforms, heft their backpacks and set off for school, an hour’s walk away in the pitch dark, their path lit by a small kerosene lamp set in a bamboo holder.

The distance is just 3km but the trail they take winds across steep jungle hills with thick foliage on one side and sheer ravines on the other.

They wear no shoes, picking their way along the narrow root-tangled and rock-strewn path and crossing a river in their bare feet.

Only when they reach the other side, do they reach into their backpacks to pull out and don their socks and shoes, still pristine and white.

They walk barefoot to keep their school shoes clean, they said.

CLEANING UP: Wendy and Jalisa Jium cleaning up before putting on their shoes after coming out of the jungle trail at a river in Kampung Kibambangan. — NST picture by Datu Ruslan Sulai

Jalisa is in Year Two and Wendy Year Six. They live in Kampung Lutung, less than 40km from Kota Kinabalu, as the crow flies.

But the tiny hamlet lies deep within the Crocker Range, one of 10 villages linked only by footpaths first beaten by their forefathers in ages past.

And Kg Lutung is the village furthest from the closest school, SK Putaton, located along the Penampang-Tambunan road. There are 103 children from the villages, and most of them walk to school.

“Except for the Lutung children, the others would walk about half-an-hour at most,” said Tony Raymond, who guided the New Straits Times to the Jium home.

For Jalisa and Wendy, the daily trek is routine. They usually make good time, familiar with the trail.

“Going to school is normally easy because it’s downhill. If it’s dry, we can reach there in an hour. But the return trip is always tiring,” said Wendy.

She and her sister hardly broke a sweat this morning, even though the trail was slippery and wet. Rain had fallen late into the previous night.

If anything, it was the NST team that held them back today. Trying to keep our balance, we grabbed branches of trees and shrubs along the path, bringing great showers of water down upon ourselves.

I fell off the path and down the steep hillside in the dark. Photographer Datu Ruslan Sulai slipped in the mud and fell on the trail.

The girls, however, were surefooted and confident. They waited patiently for us to catch up each time they got ahead.

As the day brightened, they doused their bamboo torch and left it at one of two rest huts along the way.

The trail ends at the river, and Kampung Kibambangan is on the other side. An asphalt road starts there, leading to their school about 500m away.

Their father Jium Rampaya, who is in his 40s, came with them today to register them at school. But most days the girls would be on their own, he said.

Jium, who plants hill padi and taps rubber, knows education will bring his children better lives. He and wife Irene Molidon are prepared endure the hardship of putting them through school.

“It’s not easy living a life deep in the jungle, but what else can we do? I have thought of moving downhill to Putaton or Kampung Timpangoh but I would not know how to feed my family there,” he said.

The Kg Lutung children hardly miss a day of school, said their headmistress Bernadette Giluk Dompok.

“Attendance averages between 92 and 95 per cent. Given their surroundings, I would consider it good,” she said.

“They are also excused from additional classes on Saturdays. I prefer if they rest during the weekends.”

To make up for that, extra classes for tuition are sometimes held on weekdays.

The children have also benefited from the school’s supplementary food programme, Dompok said. “That is sometimes the only meal they have.”

Why do the girls make the daily struggle to get to school? Because their friends are there, they said.

For their cousin Jarina John, the pay-off is clearer. The 12-year-old, who lives in the same hamlet as the Jiums, wants to follow in her elder sister’s footsteps.

“It’s not easy but I wish to become like Liana someday,” she said.

Liana is now 21 and studying for a degree at Universiti Putra Malaysia in Serdang, Selangor.

Their father John Gunsit works as a cleaner at the Sabah Museum. It has not been easy keeping Liana in college, and he has help from his son Melvin, who works in a Shah Alam factory.

By the light of a kerosene lamp last night, Gunsit watched his daughter pack her schoolbooks and lay out her uniform in their humble wooden house.

“I hope Jarina can follow in her sister’s footsteps,” he said. “As a father, I will do all I can. But it all depends on her.”

January 2, 2006

Still on 2005 Year in Review

Filed under: Uncategorized

Read the following post from Citizen Nades of the Sun.


T IS THE time when year-end reviews are done. Scouring our over hundreds of pages of documents, taking into account the performance of individuals and organisations, writers put pen to paper, describing the ups and downs of the year.

However, for change, it’s time to present awards to some outstanding feats, statements and actions by individuals and organisations which have made the headlines for all the wrong reasons.

So, here it goes:

Mission Impossible Award - (The Immigration Department)

According to figures on its website, (the page has since been removed) the department has left Singapore without a single habitant. The records show that 5,463,552 Singaporeans entered the country, but only 1,630,128 left the country. This means that 3,833,424 Singaporeans are somewhere the country, albeit staying illegally in Malaysia since 2003!

If the department’s statistics are anything to go by, 11,228,359 overseas visitors entered the country and only 5,438,251 left, leaving a grand total of 6,790,108 foreigners wandering aimlessly in Malaysia.

Ever wonder why Tourism Malaysia always reports an increase in tourist arrival year after? Is it using the same unreliable source for its data?

True Patriot Award - (The Malacca Water Board)

If only Information Minister Datuk Kadir Sheik Fadzir had the financial resources at his disposal, he need not be shouting himself hoarse by calling on Malaysians to show patriotism by raising the jalur gemilang on Merdeka Day

If he had followed the example set by the Board, he would have hit two birds with one stone - promoted domestic tourism as well.

How could it have been done?

The Board arranged a holiday trip to Langkawi for its staff who took part in the Merdeka Day march past. Taxpayers’ money was used to compensate people for showing “artificial” patriotism to the country.

If participants are being given incentives, we might as well reward people who raise the national flag in their homes.

So, if everyone who took part in the march past and everyone who had raised a flag had been rewarded, the whole country will be on the move! What a novel way to promote domestic tourism.

Best Talent Scout Award - (National Sports Council/Sports Ministry)

First they launched a million-ringgit campaign called Cari Champion to unearth hidden talent among the young. No one will take umbrage to that.

Then they brought in an Australian “expert” to tell us how we can excel in sports. Nothing wrong with that except that the expert told us nothing new; he told us what we already knew!

Then the picture got a bit murkier. Suddenly, an Australian turned up on our shores to be co-ordinator of the Asia.Com (Asian Games-Commonwealth Games) project.

Did our officials embark on a head-hunting expedition or was Damien Kelly recommended by an agent?

Nevertheless, while education minister Datuk Hishamuddin Hussein was screaming his head off on Malaysian Airlines proposal to hire a foreigner, Kelly’s appointment drew no flak.

He likened the appointment of a foreigner to the top position at MAS to allowing the country to be recolonised in a new manner.

What about a foreigner supposedly be calling the shots on our sports?

By the way, who’s Kelly? A coach? A sports psychologist? A sports administrator? No one knows and it is the ministry’s best kept secret.

But what does a co-ordinator do? Well, its quite simple - just co-ordinates! It’s a pity that among the 10 million Malaysian adults, there’s not a single one who can co-ordinate!

Speedy Gonzales Award - (The Anti-Corruption Agency (ACA)

In late July, this scribe wrote about corrupt practices in the operations of an illegal funeral parlour in Petaling Jaya. On the same day, the article was e-mailed to the ACA.

Despite three successive columns and two e-mails nothing materialised. An offers was made to surrender documents which would help bring wrong-doers to book. Zero response.

Then came the phone call from former Inspector General of Police, Tun Hanif Omar.

Unknown to anyone at that time, Haniff had a word with ACA director-general Datuk Zulkipli Mat Noor, himself a former police officer.

Almost a month later, the ACA office in Shah Alam was given photographs of the alleged corrupt practice. Nothing happened.

In October, after yet another article, two ACA officers recorded yet another statement.

Until today, almost six months after the first e-mail, the status of the case is unknown. Surprised?

You should not be because according to Zulikipli, only he has the ultimate power to decide if someone should be prosecuted for corruption.

So, where does it leave all of us? But the pace of investigations certainly deserves this award.

Sabar (Patience) Award - (Social Security Organisation (Socso)/Human Resources Ministry.)

Since 1996, Socso has been working with a computer system which was not integrated with other systems in operation.

And the Auditor General notes: “Even with internal audit and supervision committees, no one reviewed the system.”

So, for more than nine years, they all accepted a system which did not meet their requirements. They went about doing their jobs using a sub-standard system and no one raised an eyebrow.

For their patience and tolerance, these people really deserve the award.

Syok Sendiri Award - (The Selangor State Government)

First, it was said that the “fully developed state” status was accorded based on a “Swiss model” undertaken by the National Productivity Corporation (NPC) and two national universities.

The NPC did a survey, but the sample respondents and methodology appeared flawed. Answers were not forthcoming to some glaring untruths.

The prime minister said any state can declare itself as “fully developed”, but it has to show the kind of index or method that was used to support such a declaration.

When statistics provided by the NPC were challenged, the mentri besar did an about-turn by claiming it was a Do-It-Yourself Declaration.

Who got the thrills when the “developed state” status was proclaimed? A handful of contractors who supplied buntings, billboards, sovenris and banners laughed all the way to the bank. leaving the taxpayers to pay for the state government’s follies.

Parliamentary Foot in the Mouth Award (joint winners)

The minister in charge of parliamentary affairs, Datuk Nazri Aziz and the minister in the prime minister’s department, Datuk M. Kayveas.

The former for his outburst of the word “racist” (41 times) in a 15-minute tirade against the opposition bench.

The latter, on two occasions turned the August House into a zoo by referring to honourable members as “monkeys”.

But the second occasion was poignant because he sure gave the European Parliamentarians some assurance that some Malaysians do live on trees!

Mother all Phrases Award (joint winners)

Selangor Mentri Besar, Datuk Seri Dr Mohd Khir Toyo and deputy home affairs minister, Datuk Noh Omar

“Semuanya okay” This phrase will be etched in the minds of thousands of Malaysians forever.

The greenery surrounding the Bukit Ceraka Agricultural Park had been raped; the hills had been destroyed and it prompted the prime minister to take a helicopter ride to see the destruction for himself.

After meeting the PM, Khir made that historical announcement: semuanya okay, not withstanding the fact that the land had been cleared illegally.

Subsequently four organisations were charged for illegal clearing. The Selangor Economic Development Corporation (PKNS), an arm of the state government, pleaded guilty to illegal clearing and was fined RM330,000. No individual took responsibility for the carnage on mother nature.

The officers who defied the law and used taxpayers’ money to pay the fines are still there - all because semuanya okay.

Noh’s “foreigners can go back” statement resulted in the biggest disaster caused by an individual on a public relations exercise undertaken by the government.

While his boss, the minister was placating officials in China, Noh timed his statement to near-perfection. His ticking off by the prime minister may have dome some damage control, but till the end, Noh remained defiant saying that “if the media had misinterpreted my comments, a apologise”.

He did no one any favours with the subsequent remarks either; it only aggravated the situation.

Two deserving winners indeed.

* Happy New Year and have a great weekend.

January 1, 2006

Love Detector

Filed under: Uncategorized

Check out this link:

I paired my name with Aiswarya Rai, My score: 30 %

With Trisha Krishnan and Rani Mukerjee also 30 %.

but when paired with Preity Zinta, I got 70 %….cool eh…..so should I kick those girls off my list of My-dream-date and- unattainable in real life-girlfriends ?

Nah…I think I’d still maintain them as in the dream world…everything is so much sweeter…hyuk hyuk…..

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